“Did you ask for God’s help this morning? Why don’t you practice believing this is it?”
– Al R., Oldsmar, FL c. 1993
I love it when I remember this one.
Whatever goes on in my day, if I’ve asked God for help in the morning, why do I doubt that I’m getting it? Why do I fight it?
I’ve been sober a good while now, and God and I have history together. You’d think I’d trust him more.
I hated going to AA at first, but that first day has proved to be the best day of my life — better than any solution I could have dreamed of or wished for in my previously unhappy, unsatisfied, unappreciated life.
Alone in a crowd
Have you ever had something get in the way of what you wanted and later found out it was for the best? Like, for example, my horrid ex-husband leaving me, if you must know. I kicked and screamed at God about that one, but it was the second best day of my life.
These days, I figure when there’s a long line at the grocery store, why not just breathe in and out, then spend the extra couple of minutes to chat with the lady behind me whose grown daughter perhaps didn’t have time to call her this week. When I get stuck working 20 minutes late, and am angry that I’m going to get stuck in rush hour traffic, maybe the crazy driver out on the street will make his turn and I won’t be there to serve as the oncoming car.
Maybe somebody else at work needs what I can do, and my working an extra 20 minutes will help ease her workload for tomorrow. Why don’t I just get out of God’s way and let the world spin without trying to be at the center of it all the time.
So I stop and remember this simple principle — why don’t I try believing that this is the very thing that I asked for: God’s help in my life. Sure makes those petty annoyances seem trivial, inconsequential — and it makes me, when I accept that it’s all in God’s larger plan — well, I’m … dare I say it — almost … serene?
