The real truth is that we have no complete explanation for the world’s individual and social wrongs.” I really like this part! The truth is, I am only just coming to realize how much time I put myself in the victim role. Part of it is, that I was once and am still coming to believe that this trend does not have to be my lot in life. Letting Go and Letting God, and trusting Him/Her with my life is a daily practice for me and is definitely not my natural tendency. It IS getting better.

I also like the fact that I will never have a complete explanation for the world’s individual and social wrongs. God usually gives me the information I need when I am willing, but when I am trying to figure it all out, I am working against myself and God. I am also usually trying to hold onto something that isn’t helping me on my spiritual path.

Happy 24 everybody.
Lara

Thanks again Paul

It’s not often now but occasionally I find myself in the ‘blame others room’. My God only allows me to stay in there for the time it takes to look at it, see the truth, and learn/grow from it. My own difficulties/actions/opinions effected others and no doubt occasionaly still do, usually they were not intensional. Doing the best I could with what I had. I have no excuse today as I now have a program for living that works and now I am accountable.

Two truths I know now.
1. Blaming someone requires me to remain a victim and them the enemy.
2. If I refuse to forgive someone I burn the very bridge over which I too must pass.

“There was a time when we ignored trouble, hoping it would go away. Or, in fear and depression, we ran from it, but found it was still with us. Often, full of unreason, bitterness, and blame we fought back. These mistaken attitudes, powered by alcohol, guaranteed our distruction, unless they were altered.

“Then came AA. Here we learned that trouble was a fact of life for everybody—-a fact that had to be understood and dealt with. Surprisingly, we found that our troubles could , under God’s grace, be converted into unimagined blessings.

“Indeed, that was the essence of AA itself: trouble accepted, trouble squarely faced with calm courage, trouble lessened and often transcended. This was the AA story, and we became a part of it. Such demonstrations became our stock in trade for the next sufferer.”

That was from a letter Bill wrotein 1966

I like reading it from time to time,just to remind me of a lot of things..But mostly I think of my humanity and that everything passes sooner or later, and one way or another..Sometimes I simple have to accept ‘ Maybe God has a better idea and time will tell.’

I have had problems with fear all my life.. Including dealing with a sence of being paranoid that put me in a Psyc ward a long, long time ago.(Mind you smoking pot helped and who knows if there was anything else in it)…Thanks God and AA that I can even use that as a reminder that it could be worse today, no matter what is going on…

The difference between now and before I had the program is that I have discovered tools to use against at least some of my fears…. If I am willing to apply some effort to exert myself to make use of them..One of the best tools is God As I understand Him and prayer…” God is not going to give me anything that He and I can not handle togeather.” ( I sometimes repeat that prayer over and over as I walk towards what I am fearfull of..)….I read one time that a lot of fear is actually ” False Fear caused by Illusion”. Something else that I attempt to keep at the front of my mind… There is nothing concreat infront of me to create the actual fear..It is an illusion within my mind of what is going to happen and that I do not trust myself that I would be able to handle it.. The real crazyness is, often it is something that I have faced before and even delt positively with ..( Perhaps fear of rejection when facing someone that I do not know.)…There seems to be a lot of Fear of Rejection inside me…Another tool that seems to help is talking about it, as I am doing right here..It seems to lessen the fear alot and quite often I end up having someone else open up about having similiar fears and anxieties….Before, I sobered up, I felt like, “No one else could comprehend what I felt like..Everyone else always seems so confident and happy.”… Today, I know without doubt that is far from true…Also, I know that God and the fellowship of AA (other people like me ), can unit in at least sharing of our experience (good or bad), strength and hope to deal with these kinds of obsticles of living life on life’s terms…Trust is a knowing feeling that in the ‘ Long Term Picture ‘ I am going to be ‘ OK ‘….” If God loves me and is for me Who can be against me.”.(maybe only me..). Is another great reminder that I try to keep in mind…Cange my ‘ Way ‘ of thinking can change my whole ‘ Way of life…
Thanks and good luck my fellow travelers, Dan

I really like that there IS a spiritual solution: turning our, “concerns, worries, fears, resentments, loves, dreams, wishes, thoughts, choices, and relationships-in short, our will and our lives” (How Alanon Works, 2008, p.50) over to a Higher Power that will, and does, want to act on our behalf.

I also like the idea that my weaknesses can be used to magnify the Creators work in my life, so that even I notice it. For instance, a reading from Alanon literature says, “Anything and everything about me can be used for my good. If I feel insecure and frightened today, I will remember that my fear is a signal that there is something to learn” (Courage to Change, 1992, p. 119).

I am more at Step 2, right now, remembering that it IS possible to turn my fears, no matter how debilitating or persuasive (only in my interpretation of things), over to a Higher Power that loves and knows me enough to know what I can handle and believe that I can learn from and grow from this too.

Thanks for listening.
Lara